BOM DIAAAAAAAA!
Originally I was going to do a video on Music and Dance in Floripa, but, considering there is already a "Dance and the Nut" page, I'll continue adding to that each month instead :) So if you want dance/music: check out that page now.
The reason I wanted to write about homesickness again was because I didn't realise it but I've only really just got over it. Homesickness affects everyone in different ways so how it hit me may not hit you and vice versa. It's a confusing process and I was totally surprised that it took me two months to really feel comfortable here. Do not expect what works for you in England/your home country to work for you here! For the last couple of years I tended to put a lot of emphasis on my social life. I rarely said no to a night out during the week and at the weekend and I always had uni things (ie. society commitments, part-time work etc) to keep me busy. And being insanely busy, believe it or not, worked for me!I didn't actually spend much time at home. I've spoken to my current flatmates and they've said similar-ish things before they were here.
HOWEVER! What worked for me in England, does not work in the slightest for me here!!
For example, in the first few weeks it took me a while to adjust to just having one major thing/event on in the day. I was so used to having four/five major things a day to organise or complete. But here you cannot dash anywhere, it is physically impossible. As my flatmate says, it's like Bermuda here. The island teaches you to slow down whether you like it or not. Whenever I have (eg) two important things to do in a week, I will space them over two days (unless they require going to the same place, like uni). I would like to incorporate some regular surf time into my schedule, now that the weather is warming up and I know what I'm doing with my classes. I could easily fit an afternoon of surfing in on a Tuesday right before my evening class. But there is something that just holds you back from doing that, and instead I'm going to book them for Thursdays because they're the first full days I have available in the week. I can just see me a year ago tutting and shaking her head ;)
It's funny, a lecturer from back home sent us a stages of "Culture Shock" powerpoint that we were shown last year and I remember thinking "nope! It won't happen to me, I've lived abroad, I'm not scared, I'm not introvert, I'll be absolutely fine." Looking at the powerpoint now, I totally understand it and am almost thankful for it...
The powerpoint included things that I all of a sudden found that I was doing like feeling emotional for no reason (no, not time of the month) and making subtle comparisons with home. Don't even get me started on expectations! Oh. My. Goodness! Had I built up Brazil in my head or what!? Instead of partying every night like I - and friends - thought I would be, I am out one possibly two nights a week: and that. is. plenty! There aren't weekday offers in clubs here like there are in the UK. But then you almost don't feel the vibe to go out until the weekend anyway...
Me last year: "I'll be on the beach basically every day and I'll get a great tan again!"
Reality: the latter is half true as I have got tanned again, although there are definitely lines where I don't want them. The first could not be more untrue. For starters: it has actually been raining or chilly more than it has been boiling hot and sunny. And the wind can be ridiculous. True it isn't summer yet, so perhaps I'm being a little too hasty to assume yet.
But going back to things working and not working: I have spent much more time with myself since I have been here and having a couple of days like this works very well (for me) here. It gives you time to think, reenergise and (this'll sound weird) get to know yourself. I recently wrote an addition to the "Why Floripa" section, detailing my reasons for being here. The reasons still stand and I'm not ashamed of admitting them. I'm still going to spend another semester here because I would like to get as much out of this as possible. I mean, how often d'you get to be young, 20 years old and living in Brazil with no responsibilities but your studies? The answer is once and I am going to make the most out of it. In coming here I have discovered where my true passion in languages lies and have already experienced something only a small percent of my generation will. There is still much I would like to share with you but only a short amount of time, and there are other things I would like to do in between too.
However in making life work for me here I have had to try different things like spending time by myself, going on mini adventures to the mainland alone and making my own experiences (like that with the ukulele (see this week's Cool Story) by myself in order to really make my own fond memories. This is what really took me out of my comfort zone.
Although what really kicked homesickness and what finally made me at ease here: was cabin fever! Of all things!
This Monday just gone, we were given a 2500 word essay to write for next Wednesday and I've been in the apartment all week trying to write it. Normally this might be alright, but not only were five and half out of my seven and a half hours of lessons cancelled this week, but some virus thing was floating around, so everyone was at home in bed. So we didn't do any of our usual things like lessons, Wednesday lunch and the campus market, we were at home instead recovering.
However after four solid days at home and getting no where with my work, my brain had had enough and finally something clicked! I finally had the conviction to go out and do something (I went with my flatmate to an island of off Floripa) as well as the conviction to go to the gym (because what's better than a good work out to get those productive juices flowing) and just generally organise my life to suit me here (ie. keeping my Spanish up and my plans from December to February).
I'm pretty sure my Twitter is the most confusing thing ever for anyone who actually reads them. Facebook I leave for the kind of interesting - relevant - life updates, but Twitter gets my random, mostly trivial, thoughts. When I'm frustrated, confused, or excited actually I tend to word vomit on Twitter. But when abroad this also becomes a part of the process. These random frustrated thoughts are all your brain trying to process Culture Shock. I feel much better off when I speak out verbally or on (electronic) paper in the form of social media. But hey! It's another reason for Social Media to exist! I still haven't got around to using it but Facebook created the "How I am feeling" option on your status for a reason ;)
I'm not quite sure how to start this point off so I'm just going to dive straight into it. Having arrived here long before most other people even began their Year Abroads has its ups and downs as well. For example, you're in a routine for at least a month and a half by the time most are still trying to figure their way around. You can be a source of comfort to people because you've already been through the worst of homesickness.
The only trouble is that you don't quite have that support when you're out here because until you're out here, you do not realise how different it is to adjusting to South American life and that it is a process. I would never have dreamed that it would have taken me this long. I keep reading Facebook statuses from people partying and having joyous times in Europe and thinking "well why am I still feeling kind of rubbishy when I've been here this long already and doing so much?!" You have to remember that everyone is at different stages and we're all trying to adjust to very different lifestyles! It's not us adjusting to English life in different cities. It's us adjusting to different lifestyles in different cultures and different time zones. It's totally different from moving to uni for the first time as well. So if you were like me and took to uni life like a duck to water then do not worry that you're not adjusting quite as quick as you did back then. They are two different things. In good ways of course!!!
The trick in adjusting to life is to trust yourself, give yourself time (nothing happens over night, no really: it doesn't!) and not be hard on yourself. I kicked myself for ages for not loving life and never wanting to leave. But it was just my "bodys" way of telling me that that way wasn't working and that perhaps after this year, Brazil wouldn't be a place I would likely return to. And that is fine! You can't fall in love with every country you go to!
Although you will be told to go out and experience everything your new country has to offer I think think it is just as important to spend time with yourself, if anything to chill.
Most international people I've met have come from hectic lives back home, and you cannot come here to busy (in the same sense we would imply back home). It's just not the way of the island and you can do naught but go with it! You can work all day but the island will always find time for you to chill and recharge whether it's at home, in a bar, dancing or on an excursion. It's like we've been brought here to recharge ourselves completely. I've slept like a sloth since I've been here and probably had more sleep in two months than I've had in two years. It's just the way of the island; you're taught to calm down just a little bit. I'm going to do a health video in a couple of weeks so I'll let you know how it's helped me then.
Sorry for the essay, but it may just give someone who comes here a bit of faith. The guy who came here before me and Zuz told me that he also used to look at pictures and FB statuses of people partying and having fun and he would also think: "what am I doing wrong?" but actually have nothing to worry about. It's just how different cultures work. Erasmus parties and UFSC parties are not the same. Erasmus have had years to figure things out, Brazil is just getting started and trust me there will be plenty of opportunities to get your party on here! Truth!
And as for the language, you will figure it out and it will at some point begin to click. A couple of weeks ago I was worried my written Portuguese wasn't up to par, but now we're working on assessments, it's slowly improving :) Happy days!
Phew! So much writing! Again apologies for a long blog instead of a video but it felt necessary to document this because so many things are making sense now and if it helps at least one future UFSC exchange student then I will be more than happy!!
Just remember that you have a whole support system to back you up from flatmates to family, friends from home and your host uni, so never ever ever ever EV-AH worry that others know the secret to an amazing year abroad and are doing something that you're not! We're all very different people adjusting to very different lives in our own different ways so my number one tip is: HAVE PATIENCE!! Beating yourself up will only make you more miserable. Trust!
I still feel like I haven't said everything I want to so I may again get back to you on this.... ;) Uh oh! But for now:
CHECK OUT MY COOL STORIES OF THE LAST COUPLE OF WEEKS for something a little more delicious and upbeat! The next couple of weeks will be a little more travel-explore-y so stay tuned for fresh highlights and fun!
Right! I have sufficiently procrastinated in writing this blog and shall leave you with big hugs and kisses! If you haven't added me on Twitter then why not?! ( @talbstar )
Beijos! Byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!
Originally I was going to do a video on Music and Dance in Floripa, but, considering there is already a "Dance and the Nut" page, I'll continue adding to that each month instead :) So if you want dance/music: check out that page now.
The reason I wanted to write about homesickness again was because I didn't realise it but I've only really just got over it. Homesickness affects everyone in different ways so how it hit me may not hit you and vice versa. It's a confusing process and I was totally surprised that it took me two months to really feel comfortable here. Do not expect what works for you in England/your home country to work for you here! For the last couple of years I tended to put a lot of emphasis on my social life. I rarely said no to a night out during the week and at the weekend and I always had uni things (ie. society commitments, part-time work etc) to keep me busy. And being insanely busy, believe it or not, worked for me!I didn't actually spend much time at home. I've spoken to my current flatmates and they've said similar-ish things before they were here.
HOWEVER! What worked for me in England, does not work in the slightest for me here!!
For example, in the first few weeks it took me a while to adjust to just having one major thing/event on in the day. I was so used to having four/five major things a day to organise or complete. But here you cannot dash anywhere, it is physically impossible. As my flatmate says, it's like Bermuda here. The island teaches you to slow down whether you like it or not. Whenever I have (eg) two important things to do in a week, I will space them over two days (unless they require going to the same place, like uni). I would like to incorporate some regular surf time into my schedule, now that the weather is warming up and I know what I'm doing with my classes. I could easily fit an afternoon of surfing in on a Tuesday right before my evening class. But there is something that just holds you back from doing that, and instead I'm going to book them for Thursdays because they're the first full days I have available in the week. I can just see me a year ago tutting and shaking her head ;)
It's funny, a lecturer from back home sent us a stages of "Culture Shock" powerpoint that we were shown last year and I remember thinking "nope! It won't happen to me, I've lived abroad, I'm not scared, I'm not introvert, I'll be absolutely fine." Looking at the powerpoint now, I totally understand it and am almost thankful for it...
The powerpoint included things that I all of a sudden found that I was doing like feeling emotional for no reason (no, not time of the month) and making subtle comparisons with home. Don't even get me started on expectations! Oh. My. Goodness! Had I built up Brazil in my head or what!? Instead of partying every night like I - and friends - thought I would be, I am out one possibly two nights a week: and that. is. plenty! There aren't weekday offers in clubs here like there are in the UK. But then you almost don't feel the vibe to go out until the weekend anyway...
Me last year: "I'll be on the beach basically every day and I'll get a great tan again!"
Reality: the latter is half true as I have got tanned again, although there are definitely lines where I don't want them. The first could not be more untrue. For starters: it has actually been raining or chilly more than it has been boiling hot and sunny. And the wind can be ridiculous. True it isn't summer yet, so perhaps I'm being a little too hasty to assume yet.
But going back to things working and not working: I have spent much more time with myself since I have been here and having a couple of days like this works very well (for me) here. It gives you time to think, reenergise and (this'll sound weird) get to know yourself. I recently wrote an addition to the "Why Floripa" section, detailing my reasons for being here. The reasons still stand and I'm not ashamed of admitting them. I'm still going to spend another semester here because I would like to get as much out of this as possible. I mean, how often d'you get to be young, 20 years old and living in Brazil with no responsibilities but your studies? The answer is once and I am going to make the most out of it. In coming here I have discovered where my true passion in languages lies and have already experienced something only a small percent of my generation will. There is still much I would like to share with you but only a short amount of time, and there are other things I would like to do in between too.
However in making life work for me here I have had to try different things like spending time by myself, going on mini adventures to the mainland alone and making my own experiences (like that with the ukulele (see this week's Cool Story) by myself in order to really make my own fond memories. This is what really took me out of my comfort zone.
Although what really kicked homesickness and what finally made me at ease here: was cabin fever! Of all things!
This Monday just gone, we were given a 2500 word essay to write for next Wednesday and I've been in the apartment all week trying to write it. Normally this might be alright, but not only were five and half out of my seven and a half hours of lessons cancelled this week, but some virus thing was floating around, so everyone was at home in bed. So we didn't do any of our usual things like lessons, Wednesday lunch and the campus market, we were at home instead recovering.
However after four solid days at home and getting no where with my work, my brain had had enough and finally something clicked! I finally had the conviction to go out and do something (I went with my flatmate to an island of off Floripa) as well as the conviction to go to the gym (because what's better than a good work out to get those productive juices flowing) and just generally organise my life to suit me here (ie. keeping my Spanish up and my plans from December to February).
I'm pretty sure my Twitter is the most confusing thing ever for anyone who actually reads them. Facebook I leave for the kind of interesting - relevant - life updates, but Twitter gets my random, mostly trivial, thoughts. When I'm frustrated, confused, or excited actually I tend to word vomit on Twitter. But when abroad this also becomes a part of the process. These random frustrated thoughts are all your brain trying to process Culture Shock. I feel much better off when I speak out verbally or on (electronic) paper in the form of social media. But hey! It's another reason for Social Media to exist! I still haven't got around to using it but Facebook created the "How I am feeling" option on your status for a reason ;)
I'm not quite sure how to start this point off so I'm just going to dive straight into it. Having arrived here long before most other people even began their Year Abroads has its ups and downs as well. For example, you're in a routine for at least a month and a half by the time most are still trying to figure their way around. You can be a source of comfort to people because you've already been through the worst of homesickness.
The only trouble is that you don't quite have that support when you're out here because until you're out here, you do not realise how different it is to adjusting to South American life and that it is a process. I would never have dreamed that it would have taken me this long. I keep reading Facebook statuses from people partying and having joyous times in Europe and thinking "well why am I still feeling kind of rubbishy when I've been here this long already and doing so much?!" You have to remember that everyone is at different stages and we're all trying to adjust to very different lifestyles! It's not us adjusting to English life in different cities. It's us adjusting to different lifestyles in different cultures and different time zones. It's totally different from moving to uni for the first time as well. So if you were like me and took to uni life like a duck to water then do not worry that you're not adjusting quite as quick as you did back then. They are two different things. In good ways of course!!!
The trick in adjusting to life is to trust yourself, give yourself time (nothing happens over night, no really: it doesn't!) and not be hard on yourself. I kicked myself for ages for not loving life and never wanting to leave. But it was just my "bodys" way of telling me that that way wasn't working and that perhaps after this year, Brazil wouldn't be a place I would likely return to. And that is fine! You can't fall in love with every country you go to!
Although you will be told to go out and experience everything your new country has to offer I think think it is just as important to spend time with yourself, if anything to chill.
Most international people I've met have come from hectic lives back home, and you cannot come here to busy (in the same sense we would imply back home). It's just not the way of the island and you can do naught but go with it! You can work all day but the island will always find time for you to chill and recharge whether it's at home, in a bar, dancing or on an excursion. It's like we've been brought here to recharge ourselves completely. I've slept like a sloth since I've been here and probably had more sleep in two months than I've had in two years. It's just the way of the island; you're taught to calm down just a little bit. I'm going to do a health video in a couple of weeks so I'll let you know how it's helped me then.
Sorry for the essay, but it may just give someone who comes here a bit of faith. The guy who came here before me and Zuz told me that he also used to look at pictures and FB statuses of people partying and having fun and he would also think: "what am I doing wrong?" but actually have nothing to worry about. It's just how different cultures work. Erasmus parties and UFSC parties are not the same. Erasmus have had years to figure things out, Brazil is just getting started and trust me there will be plenty of opportunities to get your party on here! Truth!
And as for the language, you will figure it out and it will at some point begin to click. A couple of weeks ago I was worried my written Portuguese wasn't up to par, but now we're working on assessments, it's slowly improving :) Happy days!
Phew! So much writing! Again apologies for a long blog instead of a video but it felt necessary to document this because so many things are making sense now and if it helps at least one future UFSC exchange student then I will be more than happy!!
Just remember that you have a whole support system to back you up from flatmates to family, friends from home and your host uni, so never ever ever ever EV-AH worry that others know the secret to an amazing year abroad and are doing something that you're not! We're all very different people adjusting to very different lives in our own different ways so my number one tip is: HAVE PATIENCE!! Beating yourself up will only make you more miserable. Trust!
I still feel like I haven't said everything I want to so I may again get back to you on this.... ;) Uh oh! But for now:
CHECK OUT MY COOL STORIES OF THE LAST COUPLE OF WEEKS for something a little more delicious and upbeat! The next couple of weeks will be a little more travel-explore-y so stay tuned for fresh highlights and fun!
Right! I have sufficiently procrastinated in writing this blog and shall leave you with big hugs and kisses! If you haven't added me on Twitter then why not?! ( @talbstar )
Beijos! Byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!